Monday, April 2, 2012

Crushed !!!

Am I??

Better now than later… but it is more like I have been played !!
FYI, I did have a cuppa with him, but though it felt right, it felt wrong at the same time..

All of his interest was actually to see if he can make use of me!!!
I was contemplating whether I’m going to do an exciting posting like my latest two entry or just follow exactly how I felt after having a cuppa and a week of feeling used !!.
I go for the latter.

I need to stay true to my feelings, to write from the heart so that my ideas will flow like a waterfall (I wish !!) and also I can be truthful to myself.

Let me tell you the story.
02/02/2012 - Thursday
I went to see Neilly at the bakery, my so-called normal routine. My way of showing my support to a friend business.
She asked me “did you see him?” He went out with Chef , I said.
Half way through our conversation, she suddenly laughed, then she showed me text message from S,
“Kirim salam ngan Chinta lok, maksehhhhhhhhhhh”
I just said “Padah nya , nya eksen gilak “
And we continued with our conversation. She revealed to me some disturbing matters on her then current situation, but I am not going to mention about it here, as it is very P & C.
Roughly around 7.30pm, done with my tete-a- tete with Neilly, I made my way to the counter to pay for my food and drinks and bread to bring home, but S was nowhere to be seen. Oh well, Neilly did mentioned that he was shy.
So I told Neilly to “ Babe, kirim salam Chinta sikit lok ?!!”
Knowing Neilly, she went straight to the kitchen and told him, I could hear a loud noise from the kitchen then I went home.

06/02/2012 – Monday
Me and my friend, Siti @Along went to the bakery as I had wanted to celebrate her birthday early and to pass her birthday gift as well. But before that, I texted Neilly through Whatsapp asking her on their bread stock for the day.
What I like about the bakery is, they prefer quality over quantity, they will not produce more than ten loaf of bread.
But… let me continue with my story ya..
We went there at around 4pm, but Neilly was not around as she was out buying stock for the shop, but she promised she won’t be long.
We carry on our conversation, then Neilly showed up. And, he showed himself too, guess he needed Neilly to be around, as his support system maybe.
Before we heads home, I had to wait for the staff to slice the loaf as I had specifically request for a white toast and as it is still on the cooling tray, we had to wait, and there he was standing at the counter, showing himself finally.!!!!
I had asked him to slice the loaf, and he was telling me, that the loaf is still hot but I insist (I was kinda flirting actually… AND newsflash he was too….)
So I said, “ Saya mauk Intan payung.. he made a move ala Apek Senario and dash to the kitchen to slice the loaf and then after putting it the plastic, he went out to pass the bread for me to pay all smiling.
Okay,… Smitten !!! both are …. ( During that particular time I supposed!!)
Truthfully, am not in the mood to continue but none theless..
Next…..The story goes like this..

We had our first ever conversation on 09/02/2012, as usual me and my friend was at the bakery to celebrate another friend birthday. We were there up until closing time which is 9 pm.
At about 8.40pm, I left them to continue with their conversation, while I went straight to get my bread and on my way to pay for my purchase, there he was, sitting at the counter waiting to talk to me.
I told him that his invitation to have a cuppa with me has got to wait (I was not ready!!!) but I could see that he was so determined , you know it was DO OR DIE things for him. He told me he needed 2 minutes of my time, so we talked in front of the counter. The main conversation was about how he wants to buy a car and was asking on the procedure, somewhere between our conversation, he was mentioning on how to apply personal loan amounting to RM40K, and how he wants to buy his dream car cash (funny don’t you think so).
I kept on asking him if he is seriously thinking of buying cars, and since I could not get all info as he was practically whispering, he suggested we talked outside, so I paid for my bread and went outside.
Then he asked me, when are we going to have our cuppa, he insisted that he can only afford to bring me to go to normal coffee shop, he was stressing the word coffee shop, I reassure him that I am ok with his venue choice up to one point when I asked him this question -> “Do I look expensive to you !!”

And he said,yes !!!

I told him, never put a price tag on everything you see for you might be wrong.

I for one, never believe in buying everything expensive, it depends on what and is it really worth buying it, of course I had my own weaknesses – accessories - earrings, bracelets, rings…
…. But truth is people, even then I already sense something amiss.

Nay… I’m not angry but sad that I get to be treated that way, made me wonder what did I do to deserve such treatment. Or am I blinded by all the attention.

I cried okay… I did!..

I felt cheated !!
But good things is, I found out about his actual intention as soon as I finished my tea.
It would be hard if we actually had something and to say no.

Truth is I don’t want to continue.. no point as the real reason on his showing all the interest merely trying his luck. To see if I would give my consent to be his guarantor to do loans.
So I am gonna end this post, just like this.

Last I heard, he is dating the sister of the Bakery Owner, happy for both of them. Only wishing he is not using that opportunity to change his life for a better ones.


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